Hey Peter…Peter Milliken…Mr. Speaker…

First day back yesterday, after a nice long holiday break, and decorum of the House of Commons – over which you preside – shows no signs of improvement.

When is the last time you ejected a Member of Parliament?

Regardless of the cynical, partisan games being played over the urgent matter of climate change you, Sir, Mr. Speaker, have plenty of authority to lower the temperature and clear some of the air during Question Period.

Start throwing out ‘honourable members’ who shout down questions and answers. A little heckling (so often seen reduced in Hansard to “Some hon. members: Oh, Oh”) is one thing but do you really find it acceptable to be Speaker (translated as “President” in French!) in such an august-looking chamber while, during the most-watched portion of the parliamentary day, voice-losing shouting, childish antics and schoolyard bullying go on?

Political junkies, like me, sometimes catch ourselves enjoying the spectacle but – really – could you reign it in a bit?

Start by convening a panel of women MPs, maybe invite them up to your official residence for cross-country skiing or some wine and a few nibblies, and listen for ways to sensitize yourself to sexism in the House. That would be a good beginning.

From there, move on to generic put-downs – which have nothing to do with the substance of any political discussions – that do not make it into Hansard. You know they happen, c’mon!

And that’s on the floor of the House, not in the galleries filled with bus loads of school kids! Have some empathy for the teachers who, on the ride back to school, need to explain away the unchaperoned behaviour of our elected representatives.

I know you like the political food-fight (and I’ve already admitted to finding guilty pleasure in it too.) Your enjoyment shows in the way you occasionally admonish ‘honourable members’ with understated, often sarcastic, directives.

Maybe that’s why many of those same ‘honourable members’ like you and, dare I say it, keep you as Speaker.

But it’s time to piss off the bullies and wield some of your authority.

Please, before anarchists start looking organized!