Not that this would be the first time I’ve done so but today’s story risks revealing just a little t.m.i. – too much information.
I set out from home late this morning, with my laptop in my backpack, first going to a noon meeting, and then coming to the internet cafe near Maple Leaf Gardens where I can tap into free wireless while downing a couple cups of java.
It was only a matter of a few minutes before a familiar face came in and sat down to do some web-surfing of his own. This face is on someone who has…er…danced for me a fair bit during some of my manic episodes at a certain club, which I have managed to stay away from since getting back on my bipolar med and abstaining from alcohol (this is Day 16…or 400-plus hours).
Like some boom-box message from G-d I spotted another such dancer on my way to a meeting last night and quickly took a detour so as to avoid conversation with him. (I was an especially nice guy, as far as he was concerned, a real special friend, don’tcha know?)
Anyway, seeing the other guy in the cafe today didn’t upset me. As a matter of fact I could glance over my computer screen and see him typing away, his pleasant smile and physique mine for the viewing without a trip to the bank machine. I was busy enough answering emails and checking Facebook to prevent myself from bursting into flames of lust. As if to tempt fate, although not deliberately, I needed to change seats because the sun was making my computer screen difficult to see so I joined him at the opposite end of a long couch (with three cushions it could easily seat four or five people of medium size). I was listening to my iPod and we were both focused on our respective computers so there were very few words exchanged, culminating in “See ya!’, and a trade of smiles, as he packed up and left a few minutes ago.
Do I know where he was going? Sure. Do I know where I could find him this evening? Of course. But I am going to a meeting, where I will be seeing my sponsor (and I’m sure she’ll have some feedback for me), and then I will – I am certain – join the meeting crowd at the Baskin-Robbins as I have done all week. My sobriety needs to continue to include abstinence from the dance club.
Meanwhile, I have added “T.M.I.?” to my blog tags. It may be useful to review past posts and see whether this category might be appropriate for some of them, too.